The hypocrite clause
This is something I feel ought to be posted publicly. It’s something that we all believe in anyway, and if it’s said out loud, maybe we could even have it accepted commonplace.
It’s called the hypocrite clause, and it works like this. Whenever you make any sort of statement, you append it silently on to the end of each statement. It reads as follows:
”, unless I feel like it.”
That’s it. Simple. It adds a shade of grey onto every conversation. No more prolonged discussions based on somebody’s wanting to remind somebody else that there are no absolutes. Get rid of all that. Nobody likes that. Just assume that whatever somebody says, they’re adding the hypocrite clause on to the end of it. Don’t call them out for it. Accept it. That way, they won’t call you out whenever you say whatever it is you say that you don’t wholeheartedly believe in.
“I would never buy a product from WalMart, unless I feel like it.”
“I would never vote for a Democrat, unless I feel like it.”
There you go. No more pesky conversations about issues neither person genuinely cares about. You just accept a small level of hypocrisy inherent in any statement, and go on through your day.
Probably would smooth out the world a bit.
